If I may be serious for a minute's time...

Started by VenomousNinja, May 04, 2012, 12:31:13 AM

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VenomousNinja

So a while ago this chick broke up with me. Whatevs, right?

Well, I liked this girl, a lot. A lot lot. She was, truly, my only source of happiness in the world, as terrible and as horrible as that sounds, it was enough for me. After we broke up, I pushed her to the recess of my mind, trying to forget about her. It didn't work, I thought about her everyday, to this day even, having fantasies of getting back together with her, of her begging me to come back. These were... Unhealthy, to say the least. I never expected to encounter her again, and every time I saw anything that reminded me of her it would throw me into a daze. Whenever a place I had to be took me on the road next to her house, I would feel sick, whenever I saw a girl who looked like her, or a place where we'd spent time together, I would feel like dying. It was bad, to say the least.

Today she posted a picture of one of our mutual friends to Facebook. I clicked on it, not knowing it was her album. Seeing her name hit me, hard. I couldn't think straight for thirty minutes, at least. It was during this time that I realized, well, I say realized, but in truth I already knew, so I'll say that it was during this time that I applied the concept of acceptance I had learned.

She was gone, there was no way of changing that. She had pushed me out of her life a bit, and I had ran out the rest of the way. That was a mistake, yes. There is nothing I can do about it, though so I have to accept it. I still have feelings for her, yes, but that is just something that I will have to live with. They'll fade in time, and in truth these feelings matter very little, as they are probably the remains of faded memories, and do not resemble the truth. I'll have to accept it. The truth is I probably won't ever see her again, and she's happy without me. I'll have to accept it.

Her leaving me felt like death, like my life was over, like it was raining forever. But it isn't death, and my life continues. I'll have to accept it.

And with that, the rain stopped. I felt free, lighter, happy. I will have to find my own happiness in life, but that's okay. It's probably unhealthy to have it any other way. I've accepted what I can't change, and that is perhaps the first major step on the path to the emotional recovery I've been seeking for over two years.

So I'm here today, Project Stealth, to share with you, that if you cannot change something, accept it. It is the way it is. You can't unthink the rain, but you can be okay with it being there.

Just wanted to share this little moment of mine with you all.

frvge

#1
Welcome to the club. And the worst part is, even if you stay "friends" she'll probably never call you again. So if you want to use that "friendship" to still do cool stuff together, it's all coming from you and not from her. Takes time and it's still hard.
Quote from: savior2006SCDA has more bugs than a rain forest.
Quote
Treat your customers with respect you make more customers. Treat your customers like pirates, you make more pirates.

DreadStunLock

#2
Don't buy it.

and you also didn't say why you broke up...

Pusianka

Bought it.

I also got over such thing. Now is the best time to get into developing yourself, just for yourself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHa_jqxnn4o

"- It's 106 miles to Chicago. We've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
- Hit it."

VenomousNinja

Quote from: frvge on May 04, 2012, 12:38:44 AM
Welcome to the club. And the worst part is, even if you stay "friends" she'll probably never call you again. So if you want to use that "friendship" to still do cool stuff together, it's all coming from you and not from her. Takes time and it's still hard.
Yea man, we decided that we shouldn't be friends because she was unwilling to resolve still lasting emotions that could negatively effect it, so we just stopped talking to each other.

Quote from: DreadStunlock on May 04, 2012, 12:39:10 AM
and you also didn't say why you broke up...
That's a tricky subject.

Quote from: Pusianka on May 04, 2012, 02:36:47 PM
Bought it.

I also got over such thing. Now is the best time to get into developing yourself, just for yourself.
Yea, I have to focus on myself, make myself better, and myself happy. In fact, everyone should do that, really. It's a good way to live.

Spekkio

At first I thought you were going to ask for advice following this story, and I was going to tell you that you're probably asking the wrong audience...

As far as your experience goes, sorry for your loss and all, but your story isn't all that detailed. I'm not sure what you want people to learn from it other than you got hurt and you're better now.

Most people end up feeling like you after a breakup because they feel like they've lost something they can't replace, when in reality that's not really true. Usually happens after the first serious relationship or when someone who doesn't ordinarilly "do well" with women finds a lady friend.

PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends. And the best thing you can do to get your ex to want you back is ignore her and move on with your life...all of a sudden you'll find some sort of facebook message/text message.

DreadStunLock

Quote from: Spekkio on May 11, 2012, 02:18:49 AM
PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends. And the best thing you can do to get your ex to want you back is ignore her and move on with your life...all of a sudden you'll find some sort of facebook message/text message.

Son of a b****

Even he uses that too. T.T

VaNilla

Quote from: Spekkio on May 11, 2012, 02:18:49 AM
PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends.

Lies. That is all.

DreadStunLock

Quote from: STON3COLDKILLA on May 11, 2012, 05:52:17 PM
Quote from: Spekkio on May 11, 2012, 02:18:49 AM
PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends.

Lies. That is all.

It really depends, I think it's quite biased, but it's very common to be true.

frvge

AFAIK it's true. I believe it'll work out in the end. Thusfar, doesn't seem like it, but we'll see.
Quote from: savior2006SCDA has more bugs than a rain forest.
Quote
Treat your customers with respect you make more customers. Treat your customers like pirates, you make more pirates.

nubishdubishbone

May God grant you the serenity to accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I feel for you bro, i haven't had a girlfriend in 13 years because nobody like my ex is as sweet and enjoyably happy as she is. i have moved on to abstinence ; )
Intel i5 3.2Ghz - EVGA Z77 FTW - EVGA GTX 480 - 4GB DDR3 1066MHz - Rosewill Blackhawk SuperTower Case - Antec True Power Quattro 1200W PSU - WD Caviar Black 1TB - Creative Recon3D Fatal1ty PCIe -Logitech Z508 5.1 Surround with "Dialog Plus"

DreadStunLock

#11
Quote from: nubishdubishbone on May 12, 2012, 10:33:23 PM
May God grant you the serenity to accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I feel for you bro, i haven't had a girlfriend in 13 years because nobody like my ex is as sweet and enjoyably happy as she is. i have moved on to abstinence ; )

[frvge edit: not needed. First warning]

nubishdubishbone

she's married and i don't believe in affairs... haven't felt that comfortable with a chick since, don't know what could be wrong with it i'm 30 something and have 2 kids...
Intel i5 3.2Ghz - EVGA Z77 FTW - EVGA GTX 480 - 4GB DDR3 1066MHz - Rosewill Blackhawk SuperTower Case - Antec True Power Quattro 1200W PSU - WD Caviar Black 1TB - Creative Recon3D Fatal1ty PCIe -Logitech Z508 5.1 Surround with "Dialog Plus"

Pusianka

Quote from: Spekkio on May 11, 2012, 02:18:49 AM
PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends.

Wrong. I have a friend who is a woman and she is sexy and I did thought that I might fall in love with her but then again, I knew that our friendship could have broken and she really needs this friendship, just like I do. So we're friends. I assure you - it works!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHa_jqxnn4o

"- It's 106 miles to Chicago. We've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
- Hit it."

DreadStunLock

Quote from: Pusianka on May 13, 2012, 09:18:27 PM
Quote from: Spekkio on May 11, 2012, 02:18:49 AM
PS: Men and women can't be friends. Exes especially can't be friends.

Wrong. I have a friend who is a woman and she is sexy and I did thought that I might fall in love with her but then again, I knew that our friendship could have broken and she really needs this friendship, just like I do. So we're friends. I assure you - it works!

No, you need to get your mullet shaved off and actually start washing and conditioning your hair, that's when she will fall back.